July 19, 2022
This isn’t the email I was planning to send today.
I was finishing up my original message yesterday afternoon when I was called into the lobby to help translate for two young women who spoke no English. In case you are wondering, I speak decent Spanish, having grown up in Latin America.
Due to their lack of English skills, they were confused about where their appointment was, and had come to our administrative office rather than to a clinic.
As I spoke to them, I learned that Violet, who was just 18 years old, was pregnant and wanted an abortion. In fact, due to the language barrier, she thought she was coming to our office to have an abortion right then. Someone else had made the appointment for her, and she had been unable to complete her First Care intake forms online because her inexpensive phone had a cracked screen.
Violet’s ex-boyfriend had broken up with her the second he found out she was pregnant. He immediately blocked her number and social media accounts, and she hadn’t seen him since. Violet is completely alone, having traveled to America by herself from Guatemala. It turns out that her friend (and now emergency contact) was a co-worker who she had only met a few weeks ago. They both clean houses for $10 an hour.
In my rusty Spanish I tried to reassure Violet that everything was going to be ok. She didn’t see it that way. She had lost $80 from missing work, she didn’t have any family to support her, and she was too scared to tell her mom about the pregnancy.
Her body language told the story as she tightly gripped the chair she sat in with both hands.
Thankfully I was able to connect her with one of our Spanish-speaking nurses who rescheduled her appointment. It is today at 10am.
I’m not sure if Violet will keep her appointment or not. It seems very unlikely that she will choose life given her circumstances. But we see God perform miracles every day in our clinics as women in dire circumstances choose life!
There is a reason that God directed her to First Care. There is a reason that he had her talk to me in my broken Spanish. God loves this young woman very much.
Will you please join me in praying for Violet?
Pray that she keeps her appointment.
Pray that she chooses life.
Pray for her salvation.
Pray that God would intervene in her circumstances.
By the way, Violet is only 5 weeks and 2 days pregnant. So even if Florida had a heartbeat bill, she could still legally end her unborn child’s life.
Please be in prayer,
The question on everyone’s mind is: Did Violet keep her appointment?
Short answer: she called to reschedule.
While it would have been great for her to come in today, this may end up being a positive thing. Typically, First Care does not perform ultrasounds unless a mom is at least six weeks into her pregnancy. Since Violet was only 5 weeks and 2 days, she would not have been eligible for a scan today. Ultrasounds are a powerful tool for helping women understand what is going on inside them. I will continue to update you on her progress.
I rarely deal with clients, and even then, I usually only meet the women who have chosen life. Yesterday was a great reminder to me about the incredible amount of stress the women we serve are under.
Violet’s friend was in her early 30’s and had children of her own. She told me that she had been worried sick about Violet’s situation for the past two weeks. She said they both knew that abortion was wrong, but what other option did she have with no family, no boyfriend, and no money?
In that moment I caught a rare glimpse into the lives of our clients. So often this is the dilemma they face: I know it’s wrong, but what else can I do?
That may be the biggest evil of abortion and the so-called pro-choice movement. Removing all hope and encouraging women that the only way out of their circumstances is to sacrifice their own children.
In the moment yesterday, it made me very sad to see. Now as I think about it, it makes me very angry, and I know it upsets you too.
Within minutes of hitting send on my previous email, I was inundated with replies from people offering prayers, money, and even adoption.
How silly that the world can look at us and accuse us of not caring about women, or only caring about babies before they are born and not after. Shame on them for being so easily deceived.
Thank you to everyone who is praying. Please keep praying. God hears our prayer and is sovereign in working all things together for good for those called according to His purpose!
I am truly honored to serve you in this capacity,
P.S. You can always learn more about your ministry at firstcareforlife.com
To answer the question on everyone’s mind: yes, Violet did come in for her appointment yesterday!
Violet met with two bilingual members of the First Care staff and had the opportunity to see her unborn child through an ultrasound. It turns out that Violet is a month further along in her pregnancy than she originally thought. At nine and a half weeks, she can still have a legal abortion in Florida, and is medically eligible for the abortion pill.
Violet lives with her two older brothers—the oldest is only 23. Both brothers work seven days a week to send money back to Guatemala to support their widowed mother and three younger siblings. Violet cleans houses during the day and takes English classes at night. A charming young man from her class managed to get her pregnant during her first ever sexual encounter.
Turns out the father of her baby wasn’t quite so charming when he blocked her phone number and social media accounts when she told him about the pregnancy. He dropped out of the English class, and last Violet heard, he had left Florida entirely.
Violet is terrified to tell her brothers who think she is still a virgin. She is worried that a child will create a financial strain that will jeopardize her family back home. She feels that she is too young to be a parent, yet is fearful of placing a baby for adoption.
So, has Violet chosen life? Not yet. Keep praying! She has a follow-up scheduled for next Monday. We have encouraged her to bring one of her brothers.
Like many women contemplating abortion, she just wants it to all go away.
That is the great lie of abortion, because nothing can make it all go away. Yes, an abortion may keep her from having to tell her brothers, and it may even help financially, but the price she will pay is the knowledge that she ended the life of her own child. And that will never go away. If this is something you have experienced you can find resources here.
I mentioned in an earlier email that a number of people offered Violet financial resources, and one even offered to adopt her child. I truly loved seeing these hearts of compassion.
I want to assure you of a few things:
1. Every woman is offered material resources. It is important to understand though, that often the only thing keeping a woman from abortion is her inability to pay for it. So, while I would love to give Violet money, we can’t do that until she has firmly chosen life.
2. Every woman is counseled on adoption. There are far more families waiting to adopt than there are babies being placed for adoption. While it may seem obvious to you and I that this is Violet‘s best option, she has to be the one to see it that way.
3. Every woman is educated about resources that already exist to help moms and babies. From free pregnancy healthcare, to maternity housing, to parenting classes, to teen mom mentoring programs, to food assistance, our Community Resources Director works to get them connected with the help they need.
We will see a thousand women just like Violet this year. And while hers is a hard case, it isn’t the hardest one we have seen. She isn’t living in her car. She isn’t addicted to drugs. She isn’t being treated for cancer. She hasn’t had other children taken away by DCF. She isn’t in fear for her life from an abusive boyfriend.
Every woman that we see believes that she has a good reason for abortion. All 5,537 women who had an abortion last year in PBC believed they had good reasons for having an abortion. It is our job to help them understand that no matter what their reason for abortion is, abortion is never the right answer.
First Care can only do this with your support. Please consider making a gift so that we can continue to support women like Violet.
Grateful for you!